02I think Mike is getting tired of me talking!  Now, before you say “Duh” out loud, I have to explain! I think that I am a pretty funny gal by nature!  When I was younger I knew that I would be cast on some sit com for my stellar comedic skills, but I never went to a casting call so that didn’t happen!! Lol!!  Then in my 30’s I wanted my own TV show where I would invite guests to join me on the couch where I could grill ’em!! Yeah, that didn’t happen!   The next project however, is still in the making, and this one is happening!!  My BFF and I are getting ukuleles and starting a variety show.  I think this is going to be a hit with our GoPro cameras attached to our heads!!  The sad part is, we are the only two so the “variety” is somewhat limited until we find a bongo player or something then it’s to the bar we go!! We can’t be any worse than the Karoke  singers that used to sing at O’Malley’s on Friday nights!! Whew,  I am still scarred by that!!

So now  we are basically empty nesters since Addie is gone a lot,  but our dynamic has changed.   We are basically forced to spend more time together, which when the kids are around is no big deal, but now, we have to find topics that we can discuss in common! (That is my “why” for the ukulele gig!!)   Sunday, the girls and I were in the kitchen canning pickles and I said to Addie, “Tell Sis what I told you about Dad and I!”, she laughed and said to Erin, “Mom said she and Dad are divorcing as soon as I move out!”  Erin just laughed knowing that is not the case, but it got me thinking!  How long does it take once your kids leave home to rediscover your relationship?  (Besides, my trade in value sucks now, so that dramatically changes my view!!)

I know that being this age,  things in life have taken a dramatic twist!  I have prepared as much as I can for the ebbs and flows of marriage, children, family, health and love and I have managed to balance my marriage and my children fairly equally,  I think!   Now that Mike is the lucky recipient of my time and talent, I think he should be more appreciative!! HA! Don’t you think that he should repay the gesture with long conversations about whatever I choose, or the topic of the day??  I do!  Instead, he rolls his eyes and speaks to me as he always has……in short answers and the quietness that I fell for 28 years ago–you know, the strong silent type!!  The silence is what I appreciated then and what I need to remind myself to appreciate again! I guess it will be good to reconnect even if we are completely different people than we were pre-children.  At least we got to grow up together!!  It will be a bit like first dates all over again minus the staying out until 3 or 4 in the morning!!   We have had 27 years of children consecutively in our house and have loved every single minute.   We both say that if we could have had 12 children we would have!   So now it’s time to really hone my skills!! I have time to dedicate to the ukulele and will take lessons!  I have time to write and improve my blogging skills.  (I really think I need to stop writing like I talk since comma does not mean “take a breath!”)   I have time to spend with those I love.  I will have time to do something for me….. I don’t know what that would be, but I will have time.  Therein lies the problem between having time and actually doing something,  that will be the challenge!!  I certainly would appreciate any advice you might have on surviving your spouse into old age!!  It can’t be as difficult as I think it will…  The hardest part is going to be not having Addie around everyday.  That reality is more than I can allow myself to think about right now.  There isn’t enough Wellbutrin on earth to make that better, but that’s another blog…sniff…sniff.

Until then….listen, respond accordingly, love.


P.S. no sooner had I posted this and I opened my email to find an article from a site I subscribe to titled “The Changing Nest” by Madison Taylor. It talks about the same thing I addressed in my post only it focuses on the importance of honoring your children’s accomplishments and each stage of their lives! I like that. I couldn’t be more proud, so in addition to rediscovering myself and the hubs I will honor the three gifts God sent! Peace.

3 thoughts on “Togetherness…

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