I look at my life in little moments and blocks of time rather than looking at the big picture. I look back at moments when I was growing and learning and it gives me a much more like-able view of who I am since I have gotten older! Now, those moments of growth have turned into teachable moments. I feel, as a parent, it is my job and duty to share those “mistakes” or “growth issues” with my kids and to set an example by doing things better than I had before! If I look at my life as a big picture, often times the rough patches will cloud the times that were/are amazing. Each and every person I have come in contact with during my entire life leaves some kind of energy footprint on me; some are positive and have given immense joy, some have drained the pond, some have spewed anger and discontent and some have left sorrow in their wake. It is better for me to remember blocks…..the hurts don’t seem as powerful then! It works for me and my empathetic personality.
I feel that in my life the more exposure I get the more I grow, which is true of all of us. Growth hurts and leaves scars sometimes, but staying where you are leaves scars you won’t see until you look back. Taking chances and change takes guts! I choose change. I am the change!!
I have stopped asking “why me?” a long, long time ago. A dear friend of mine who was sick with Leukemia and dying said, “Why not me? Not everyone could handle this!” Her prophetic words changed my life and unknowingly prepared me for my own journeys years later. Why not me makes the tough days better for me somehow. Maybe it’s the beautiful reminder of my beloved friend. So the “why me?” has changed the trajectory of my life…every day attempting to be a better version of myself. Not everyday successful but still trying!!
I think that you could ask my kids but one of the biggest ways that I have grown as I have reached the mature age of almost 52, (tongue in cheek!) is the ability to control my temper, which in turn usually controls my mouth when I am angry. I am learning to take ten minutes and cool off before I go to town on something. I have customers who call and scream about something and I am always more responsive when they are nice! Isn’t that ironic? If you are nice to me, I am nice to you!! It really does work that way!! So, today when someone’s temper gets the best of them I want to tell them to take ten minutes and relax, but I never do! That is where I got the title to this little blog! My Gram was full of timeless wisdom. You do get more bees with honey and you get more understanding when you are decent to people. I love working with nice people, but I am less than thrilled to work with people who are screamers and always angry! It’s exhausting!!
Finn, my grandson, is having some difficulty communicating! He is 20 months old and just now learning to say a few phrases. It is easy for me to understand what he wants because I speak his language, but when I don’t understand he throws himself on the floor and screams for 15 minutes! Toddler tantrums are expected from little folks, but when someone is an adult, it makes them look ridiculous! He also knows that CoCo will reward sweetness with loads of love and treats!! Finn is even beginning to listen when we talk to him about his tantrum and in time he will express himself with words and the process of tantrums will go by the wayside, we hope!! There is hope for little people, not so much for the grownups.
Toddlers also recognize the not so nice behavior in people older than they are. Finn will tell you to STOP if voices raise or he is uncomfortable! Time to tune into our inner toddler!! Before we spew anger at each other or yell at someone or something ridiculous, slow down and think about how it makes you feel and look!! Not tough!! This world is getting worse. Don’t follow the crowd!! Think! Wait! Speak!! Be kind!
Until then…..why not you.. love vibe