“Toot toot Tootsie, good-bye! Toot toot Tootsie, don’t cry!”….I think I was 7, but then again, everything happened at 7….pretty sure that’s when I walked into Gram’s house and I heard the console stereo belting out Al Jolson singing Toot Toot Tootsie!

The video is kind of amusing!

I thought that was the funniest song ever, but mostly I loved the way that it made Gram smile and do a little jig! She would take my hands and we would circle around the kitchen while she tried to sing! Her voice had long lost it’s luster and was pretty gravelly, much like my own. She loved the old 78’s and Tootsie was one of her favorites, which made it mine too at 7. Vaya Con Dios, Les Paul and Mary Ford version was a good one when she was feeling sentimental. I remember every word…

My ITunes has roughly 4,800 songs that I shuffle through every single day! Music is my therapy and I have all genres! This morning while I was driving to work the first song to connect was Toot Toot Tootsie and at the same time a beautiful red cardinal flew right across the road in front of me! I giggled out loud and in my mind I was dancing in the kitchen with Gram! I was immediately tossed back to 417 13th. I could smell the smoke, the bacon cooking and the coffee. I could see the dust particles glistening on the sun rays beating in the kitchen picture window. They were floating so slowly that I would take my hand and fan them to get them to make patterns. I could hear the stereo by the front door playing a happy Tootsie and I felt so warm. I could feel her hugs, they were the best. Mornings in the kitchen were the best! French toast with powdered sugar and Mrs. Butterworth’s syrup served hot and delicious from the big cast iron skillet, a cold glass of milk, and Bop sitting on the bench telling wild stories of his son, Elmo. Elmo lived in the tundra of Alaska and Bop said he had him with some Eskimo woman while he was mushing dogs when he was young! Crazy stories that used to wind us up and make us crazy! He had a bizarre sense of humor!! I think maybe he read too many Jack London novels in his day!

I guess that after yesterday, and the heaviness in my heart, I needed yanked back into gratitude. I need to thank the ITunes shuffle feature and a pretty little red cardinal that dared to fly in front of me! Gratitude isn’t always easy when you are feeling the hurt, but there is always a reminder somewhere.

Until then…Toot toot Tootsie….

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